Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
