he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize