I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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