Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize