is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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