like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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