I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I came so hard my ears popped.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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