I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
