can u get pink eye on your cock?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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