have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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