Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
