I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
