Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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