I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Randomize
