Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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