FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize