Can Purell be used as lube?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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