No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize