i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
