What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Randomize
