Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Randomize
