The maid of honor just puked.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize