is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
he was CRYING into my vagina
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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