I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
