have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
