I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Your penis caused this!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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