He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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