member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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