She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
