Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
