I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
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