Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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