looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
