just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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