just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize