is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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