Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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