last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
