He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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