she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
