new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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