I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
