Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Randomize