sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
