girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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