But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
i now understand why vodka
Randomize
