i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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