idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
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