he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Hippo gnu deer
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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