what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
