She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize